Benjamin Baby

As a mom, you kinda get accustomed to that constant, low-level feeling of guilt over everything related to your child. Am I too smothering? That will cause him to be a social retard. Did I forget to tell him that I love him before bed? He will probably torture animals and set fire to clergy members because of it. Am I dressing him like a dork? He might -oh no!- become a Republican. And on and on and on…

Then something happens that makes you feel a tremendous, butt-clenching amount of pure guilt… like, say, taking your son for a walk, tripping over your own big feet and having your fall on concrete cushioned by your 5 month old’s skull. Yeah, that was today. He’s okay, thank god. A very kind passer-by helped us get to the hospital where he had a CAT scan. No sign of a brain bleed or skull fracture, thankfully, but he has a nasty, bloody bump on his head. Of course I had to take pictures of it…

The craziest part? He cried after it happened but soon returned to giggling and generally being a sweet, laid-back kid (as I type this, I can hear him laughing with Kurt in the nursery). While he normally has a sunny disposition, I am naturally convinced that his joy is a sure sign of major brain damage. Pass me the Valium, please…